Thursday, February 5, 2009

amazing women

just the other day…

i had been privileged. yesterday, i was in the company of women who were stronger than anyone i’ve ever come across with besides my mom. i never realized how truly strong women are until i heard their stories.

it’s amazing, actually. love sometimes makes itself so present that no amount of pain and deception can even chase it away. then again, love sometimes disappears completely that the presence of pain and deception and relentless lies seem to be likened to soft music. it’s there, omnipresent, and yet not truly being able to fully affect a change. there’s just numbness.

i remember seeing this film with pierce brosnan in it. i think the title of the film is don’t talk to strangers. pierce said, “i know how you feel. i was separated from my family once. and the pain seemed to come everyday. then, as if for all practical purposes, one day you wake up and the pain’s gone.”

i’m a fool. a friend has kept telling this to me over the last few weeks, months, years even. nevertheless, you can never truly understand something you don’t truly love and are not willing to give your heart entirely to.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Let Time Pass By

So right now, I'm typing with the constant pressure that my son would wake up very soon.

I don't know how to express what I'm going through.

It feels like a divorce wherein I no longer want to get back with my ex.

And at the same time, everything good that ever happened in our life excluding all the lies make everything worth keeping together.

Just as I said, my son just woke up. And my mother is calling out to me to attend to my son. There is no liberation to responsibilities. Absolutely nothing.